Janis, Hope, Church, & Cedar Creek Winery.

(kind of long but I think it’s worth it)

Since some are under the impression that all I do is blog about negative things (which I think is rather unfair) I thought I would share a rather hopeful experience I had today.

And surprisingly and refreshingly enough . . . there was a church involved.

But first a bit of backdrop . . . for those of you who are new to our story. A year and a half a go Anna and I got married. We went on our honeymoon. And we met some good people . . . the Schwenzen’s . . . Mike and Jill . . . and now their new baby girl Hadley.

In a nutshell . . . meeting Mike & Jill was one of those watershed moments in our life. I was working for a very big church. Anna was working in the President’s offices of one of the biggest denominations in the world. And on our honeymoon with 2 total strangers . . . we were able to have honest conversations (i.e. discuss “different” theology and practice over a glass of wine without worrying if we were going to get in trouble) about our faith for the first time in a very long time.

This made us realize that it was a shame that we had to travel that far in order to feel comfortable and safe to be ourselves. And that when we got back, we would be ourselves, even if it cost us stuff.

Mike & Jill on the other hand had gotten married on the same day as us. They lived together before they were married in a committed and deep relationship. They hadn’t really gone to church since they were younger. So they were unable to find a pastor who was willing to marry them because they lived together. After trying a couple of churches . . . they went to a city 3 over from theirs. Here they met Pastor Janis . . . and the Advent Lutheran Church of Cedarburg Wisconsin.

So on Thursday we went to meet Janis . . . the man who saved our new friends faith . . . who gave them new faith . . . and consequently saved our faith.

I’d like to share my side (I’m sure Anna has a great story to tell as well) of our experience with one of the first men I’ve met who felt like a “pastor”. Not a corporate guru. Not a big shot zipping all across the country. Not a moralist. Not a preacher. Just a humble man who was about as warm and “embrace-ful” as any man I’ve ever met.

We walk into the church . . . I walk forward to extend my hand and he envelops me in a hug that lasts about 10 seconds. And it wasn’t a “weird” hug. It’s one of those rare hugs that you could collapse into and cry for a few hours for no reason at all (or maybe I just have issues).

We then pulled up a couple of chairs in the middle of the church and just talked for a few minutes. He just started asking questions about us. Genuinely interested. He told us about his community. He didn’t give numbers. Didn’t quote witty sermon illustrations. Didn’t share the style of music. He got out pictures and told us stories about some of his members. A family who was exiled from their former church when their daughter “came out of the closet” with her sexuality. The story of a man who wanted to be married in a church but didn’t want the name of God mentioned, didn’t believe in God, nor wanted to even hear his name (although after meeting Janis changed his mind).

The whole time we were sitting and visiting in the course of an hour . . . 3 different people came in. A lady from down the street who worked at the Cedar Creek Winery. She brought Janis his bill for the wine he had purchased to give away as gifts in his little “trivia” contests. She gave Janis a hug and they chatted for a few minutes. Janis then told her that we were finished visiting him we were to walk down to the winery on the creek and pick us a couple of bottles of wine on him (as we got down their later we found out that the lady didn’t go to the church at all but she didn’t quit bragging about what a gracious and loving man he was and how every church should be so lucky as to have a pastor like Janis).

Another gentleman just stopped by to say hello and to tell him that the school board’s website had been updated with their “protests” over mandatory drug testing at the local school meeting earlier in the week. Then someone else just casually walked in and said hello to Janis. Not once was he busy with “meetings” or was his schedule dictated by a BlackBerry. He was just a community pastor in conversation with his community.

He and I dabbled in some theology talk for a bit. Which triggered something that reminded him of a song. Out of nowhere he asks Anna and I to follow him into the “sanctuary”. He asked us to have a seat in the pews (it’s been forever since I sat in one of those). He told us he wanted to play a song for us from a CD. He asked us to close our eyes and imagine that we were being held like an infant. Being sung to. He then played a song with the lyrics that basically said, “How could anyone say you’re not beautiful? You’re beautiful to me.” I’m sure this sounds hokey to most of you at this point . . . but I assure you it was one of the most calmest, holy moments I’ve had in a while. Having this woman sing over my wife and I while Janis prayed silently. When the song was over I looked at Anna and she had huge tears falling from her eyes. Janis walks over with a gentle smile and basically said . . . “I told you”. He shared about how God sees us as beautiful. We talked about art (he’s a painter and his wife is a sculptor). We talked about God. We talked about community and embrace.

He wanted Mike, Jill, Hadley, Anna, and I to pose for a picture. Perhaps so he could tell our story one day.

He gave us a few CDs. A coffee mug. A really long hug. And hope.

An hour later . . . we left. We had met a true “pastor”.

Mike & Jill had gone from being rejected by the church for living together before marriage to being proud members of Advent Lutheran in Cedarburg. And to having Hadley baptized a few weeks ago.

Anna and I had gone from being skeptical and distant towards the church to crying with a complete stranger in the middle of Wisconsin.

All because of a warm man and his embraces.

We walked down to the winery and picked out a nice Cabernet Sauvignon.

At that point I believed in and had hope for the church again.