Loose Suggestions For Reclaiming The Real.

Per Matt and Blake’s request below and in the vein of Bob’s post (who laid out some great tips for productivity while at work), I’ve decided to layout my suggestions for how to transition out of the world of computers and back into the world of flesh and blood. And while I have no doubt a long way to go, I do feel like I have some street cred as a recovering level 80 World of Warcraft player who hasn’t played in 4 months, a former Facebook and Twitter member, and someone who has been blogging for 7+ years.

Here are some tips that I’ve been easing myself into for the last few months for whatever they are worth. And I’d be lying if I didn’t say that my 7 month old son Dylan didn’t have a lot to do with this new found maturity I’m learning.

1. Use only 1 form of social media. Whether it be blogging, Facebook, or Twitter. But never more than 1. And then use that 1 in moderation (see #9). Pick the one that helps you live “for the good of the world” the most and choose that one. I quit Facebook after 4 years a month a go and haven’t missed it at all. I quit Twitter after almost 2 years and haven’t missed it at all.

2. Clean out your RSS reader. Leave only 25 feeds in there and ditch the rest. Then only check it twice a day. Once in the morning and once in the evening.

3. Throw parties on a regular basis. And by regular I mean once every 2 weeks to a month. It doesn’t have to be 100 people. But get in the habit of having at least 10 people over to your house on a regular basis.

4. Eat 1 slow dinner a week with friends.

5. Get at least 1 hobby that doesn’t involve technology. Preferably one that forces you to be outside and social in nature. And preferably one that forces you to be outside and in reflective solitude by nature (see #6).

6. Practice solitude. Learn to turn off the internet. Learn to turn off the music. Pick up a book. Take a walk. Go kayaking. Sit on your porch or deck. Learn to BE without relying on a soundtrack in the background or a screensaver drawing your attention back to the monitor.

7. Leave your laptop at home. Whatever it is that you think is so important will probably still be there when you get home. No need to carry it with you to work. To your friends. To your parents.

8. Get rid of any stat counters or other analytics that you use to track your blog or podcast. Get back to writing for the art and therapy of writing. Not for a magic number that strokes your ego.

9. Think before you write. Don’t regurgitate. If you are going to speak, say something that hasn’t been said before. Or at the very least builds off of a previous thought. Keep the momentum moving forward. I know blogs are personal so there is nothing wrong with sharing what’s going on in your family life as a way of communicating to close friends and family. But if you’re going to be personal when you blog, keep some perspective that your family doesn’t care about what you ate or what you are currently doing every 10 seconds (cough, cough Twitter). And if you are going to be serious when you blog, be original and thoughtful. It’s time to clean up the blog-o-sphere for all the rubbish that is piling up.

10. Remember technology is a means to an end and not an ends in and of itself. Remember what technology was created for. Keep it utilitarian in nature as opposed to pure entertainment. There are probably healthier more helpful ways to be entertained.

11. When you are around your “emergent-y” friends, find things to talk about besides theology or church or the latest book (see #12).

12. Quit reading theology books. Reality is you’re probably not going to read anything that you don’t already agree with. You’re just going to be reading for more ammunition to make your points on your blog or in your “conversations”. If you’re going to read, read something that you know nothing about.

13. Think and talk locally. Quit talking globally. If you’re going to blog (see #9), blog about ideas or thing that you’re practicing locally. Or conversations that you’re having locally. Quit bitching and/or dreaming about the entire globe. Think locally. Talk locally. Act locally. Save the globe for another day.

We Are Not The Only Ones.

There is something larger going on with this whole “tired of talking” thing that apparently ruffled some feathers. I think for many of us we are realizing that our online personas have become something larger than themselves, even caricatures in a way. Which is why many have started pulling back (MarkO and his cancelation of Facebook, Twitter, and blogging / the Tall Skinny with his slow ride into the sunset / and my own context for why I landed where I landed).

This is not to say that social media is bad. But that the norm for the medium has slowly moved from being about the conversation to being about “the idea of conversation”. We like to talk about conversation and church more than we like to practice it. And online relationships have become an escape from flesh and blood relationships.

Not really sure what, if anything, I want to say about this. Other than just adding another footnote to this whole firestorm that got kicked off this week by mi amigo Nick.

Brian doesn’t really headline conferences anymore. I think that has a large part to do with the fact that he’s gotten involved in activism and music.

Doug doesn’t speak or maintain an online presence like he once did. I think that has a large part to do with the fact that he’s working on some local political aspirations.

You don’t hear their names as often in emerging church conversations anymore. I think that has to do with the fact that they said everything they needed or wanted to say and decided it’s best to get on with their lives and the art of practicing community and activism.

These are good things. They have learned what others like the Samsons, Haws, Sharps, Bronsinks, and Kiwis have learned. They have learned what I am just now beginning to catch a glimpse of. Namely, that the “for the good of the world” will never come about through a blog or podcast or book.

The fact that blogging giants MarkO, Andrew Jones, and others are deciding to hang it up and re-connect locally and relationally with those in their midst is an encouraging sign that we are not alone in our curiousity as to what the hell all of these “emergents” are still talking about when there is so much living to do.

The Emerging Church Is Dead Because Church Is Dead.

Nick has kicked up a little ant bed which has been fun and reminded me what the bad boys of summer used to accomplish back in our glory days when we used to piss people off for fun.

So I thought I would enter into the fray for a few minutes and just say that I think the whole “emerging church” conversation is a moot one. The richest and most robust expressions of “church” never have to be blogged about or talked about. They just happen. Because they are less church and more kingdom. Less church and more “good of the world”. Less church and more seminal for all involved.

I had a hunch about this a few years ago. I’m just ashamed that it took me so long to shut my mouth about the whole damn thing and just practice “for the good of the world”. While I wouldn’t trade my glory years of blogging and podcasting for a million dollars (unlike other sell outs), I wish I would have spoken with softer tones and more tempered explorations a few years ago.

To this day The Tall Skinny Kiwi and his converted U-Haul, my friends the Hendersons and D10s and their house church, the Sharps and their traveling music, the Samsons and their projects, the Bronsinks and their intentional living . . . these are the models that have inspired me to become a better man, a better father, a better friend. These people are where the life is. Where the hope is. Where the inspiration is. Embedded deeply amongst friends who are family. Knee deep in it.a

If I was still a proponent of “church” and believed in it, it would only be because of these expressions of it.

The Emerging Church and to a lesser extent the receptical of the conversation, Emergent Village, are now neutered versions of what they could be. The protectors of the conversation have A) either sold out or B) still talking to hear themselves talk. And in it’s place is just another cliche marketing veneer straight out of Grand Rapids. The degree of difference between all of the hodge podged groups that fall under the emerging/missional/resurgence banner is the degree to how much of a UFC pride fighter Jesus really is. Other than that it’s the same colored conversation, just a different shade.

There is no more subversion. There is no more critique. There is no more prophetic voice. Emerging Church is big church now. And the big boys have pushed the little boys out of the sand box.

Being away from the “conversation” for over a year now and having the unique perspective of looking back in on it, I’m reminded of the little boy from The Matrix. While Neo talks about moving the spoon and bending the spoon, the little boy simply says, “There is no spoon.”

I’m telling you right now there is no spoon. The emerging church is dead because church is dead. The emerging church is irrelevant because church as we are still talking about it in the conversation is irrelevant.

And while I’m no Pete Rollins with his veiled parables, I’ll go one step further, the god of the emerging church is dead. In it’s place is neither agnosticism nor atheism nor theism. In it’s place is a space for a spoon that does not exist.

First Day At The Beach.

And the kid loved it.

I Have Become My Mother.

I’m not sure if I’m happy about this or concerned. Currently I have a worm bin in my garage, a composting bin in my backyard, and tomato plants, banana peppers, and cucumbers coming into their own in our backyard. I just spent my entire day off running errands and taking care of “housekeeping” business. And all of my free time centers around me master planning my “dream” backyard and contemplating what to do with my rabbit “problem”. This scares me. Thanks mom.